Rate my French-to-English translation.

[SoilentGreenIsPeople]

This is my first time applying for a freelance translating job, and the guy offering it was on a tight budget, so I figured I'd have a good chance getting it since his budget was lower than what 8o percent of the seekers would work for. He provided a sample. Here it is, with my translation I submitted:

Les Français dans les prisons allemandes ont été nombreux. Il y eut d’abord des Résistants, déportés en fonction du décret Nacht et Nebel signé par Keitel le 7 décembre 1941. Il y eut aussi les travailleurs volontaires, partis dès 1940 travailler dans le Reich et dont le nombre d’arrestations ne cesse de croître à partir du 20 mai 1942 avec la prolongation obligatoire des contrats et plus de 3 000 arrestations à l’été 1942 .



The French in German prisons were numerous. There was at first The Resistance, deported according to the Nacht and Nebel decree signed by Keitel on December 7, 1941. There were also voluntary workers, parties in 1940 working in the Reich, whose number of arrests continued to increase from 20 May 1942 with the mandatory extension of contracts and more than 3,000 arrests in the summer of 1942.

[edubz123]

tres bien!

I'm a native English speaker and I took 4 years of French in high school. I would give you an "A".

The problem is that the original French passage is constructed kind of weird so when you translate the passage literally it shows some weakness in the author's style. But as a translator you preserved the original structure which is a sign of a good translator (IMO).

For example, the first sentence can be more clearly stated like this: "There were numerous French(men) in [the] German prisons." Again, that's just style.

[mallyauto86]

good good i speak fluent french and go to school in france, you've done that really well mate

[CX650]

Better than I could have done mate. I offer encouragement.

[Paul Naudin]

A+
I'm french. Your translation is very good!

[SoilentGreenIsPeople]

Thanks for the feedback, and don't feel you have to be nice!

I'm hoping I can start doing this regularly as a source of income.

[ga2jo]

well done.
you made a little mistake though

Il y eut aussi les travailleurs volontaires, partis dès 1940 travailler dans le Reich
this is the verb "partir" (leaving), not the word "parti" (political party or group)

[edubz123]

Originally Posted by ga2jo

well done.
you made a little mistake though

Il y eut aussi les travailleurs volontaires, partis dès 1940 travailler dans le Reich
this is the verb "partir" (leaving), not the word "parti" (political party or group)

ah yes, I knew that didn't sound right. I was too lazy to investigate further. I'm a lazy editor. Good catch!

[LeSunTzu]

I think you read "partis" like participants. And "dès" means "as soon as" rather than "in". This part should translate "who went working in the Reich as soon as 1940 "

[The Stig]

Originally Posted by LeSunTzu

I think you read "partis" like participants. And "dès" means "as soon as" rather than "in". This part should translate "who went working in the Reich as soon as 1940 "

I think "dès" means "since", but French isn't my native languague, so I'm not quite sure.
I would translate that sentence as follows: "There were also voluntary workers, who participated working in the Reich since 1940, ...".

You can soften and shorten many sentences. The first one for example. The correction to "There were numerous French in German prisons" makes it more plesant to read.
Also "At first there was" is a better way of starting your second sentence (in my opinion).

[edubz123]

"since" = "depuis", non?

[LeSunTzu]

Originally Posted by edubz123

"since" = "depuis", non?

Exactly.

You can translate "dès" by "since" but then you miss the nuance that it happened immediately, without any delay. Also there is no idea of participation in that text. As mentioned above, "partis" in that text means "gone" or "left".

[freejrs]

Originally Posted by mallyauto86

good good i speak fluent french and go to school in france, you've done that really well mate

Don't take spelling or grammer advice from this guy!!!!

[Vette4Life]

Ça m'a l'air tout à fait correct !

Bon travail

[mallyauto86]

Originally Posted by freejrs

Don't take spelling or grammer advice from this guy!!!!

sod off go buff your hairdresser's car

[freejrs]

Originally Posted by mallyauto86

sod off go buff your hairdresser's car

It's a real mans car!!!! None of this FWD gubbins.......

[Vette4Life]

Miata's are much better than Civic's !

Ever wonder why they always win Autocross and Slaloms ?

[SoilentGreenIsPeople]

I didn't get the job, or the two others I placed bids for.

I hope I'm able to actually get some clients, but it's starting to look doubtful.

[LeSunTzu]

Don't give up, clients don't come easily when you start in any business.

[Humpfester]

I've would have better in my French class if my French Teacher had been hot, She was not.

Keep up the good work.

[hoboholic]

I should start to learn french myself pretty soon, if I plan on going to Quebec I'm going to need it

[Vette4Life]

You'll probably have to learn our swear words too XD

[SoilentGreenIsPeople]

Originally Posted by Vette4Life

You'll probably have to learn our swear words too XD

I know a few. I'm going to start using them if I don't get some work!

[Vette4Life]

Muhahaha XD